Gratitude day 26 (slacker edition)

Call it the post-feast hangover. Or the Christmas shopping tunnel vision. Whatever.

Speaking of shopping, I’m so glad that my shopping is done. Well, virtually, anyway. Brandon & I set a pretty reasonable budget year, agreeing that he would take care of the financial aspect, and I would ‘handle’ the actual picking out of gifts. It’s funny that it took me this  long to realize just how much he dislikes trying to pick out gifts, but I love the challenge, so it works well.

I will admit, the budget thing is a little hard for me. I love to shop for others as much as I love to shop for myself. But this year our finances are a lot different then in years past, especially with me only working part time. It’s very much a test of my will, but I know, particularly in our marriage, keeping the peace with money will pay off over and over in the long run.

Regardless, after a few hours of brain storming and a few more hours scouring the internet… it’s done. Now we can focus on the best part: enjoying time with our families!

Cooking for Love

Not beating myself up again for being a terrible blogger…
It was a super busy weekend, with my parents birthdays and my friend’s “Tree Trimming Party” (aka drink festive drinks). I’ve been flexing my cooking muscles a lot more lately, as well as my entertaining charm. So here’s a quick wrap up of all the tasty things on the menu last weekend, as well as my tweaks & how I tried to ruin them. (Forgot to take a single picture, but I was BUSY!)
Friday was the tree party, and I had a hankering for angel food cake. I used Alton Brown’s recipe, which was exceptionally simple, even for a first-time-from-scratch-er. My mistake: with the flour sifting/folding technique, I assumed that I didn’t have to check the bottom of my glass mixing bowl for sneaky unmixed flour bits. I couldn’t have been more wrong. After pouring out about 2/3 of the batter into the pan, I noticed the un-incorporated bits & quickly folded them in. It definitely didn’t ruin the cake, but I think it turned out at least an inch shorter than expected. My tweak: I skipped the orange extract in favor of vanilla because I knew I would be making a super citrus-y glaze. Orange marmalade glaze: 1.5c Smucker’s Orange Marmalade, 1c powdered sugar, whipped until runny. The entire cake disappeared in 18 hours. My taste rating: 4/5 stars. Next time I’ll probably add a splash of lemon juice to the glaze to bring back some of the citrus vibes.
Saturday was my dad’s surprise birthday dinner. His wife asked me to make a dish I made for them back in July that was a huge hit. That day I was cooking for the 3 of us, and Saturday, I was presuming 8. The recipe I used was easy enough to double, but I was also trying to account for vegetarians and non-shrimp eaters. My mistake: when I was shopping for shrimp, I forgot to get the peeled & deveined. I owe my brother in law Jon a debt of gratitude for stepping in and helping me accomplish the task in a somewhat reasonable amount of time. It did make Brandon’s chicken a little cold, but all things considered, I’d say it turned out pretty tasty. My tweaks: canned artichoke hearts instead of frozen (way easier to grab & quarter); smaller, bite sized shrimp, store bought pesto. One of these days I’ll take the time to make my own pesto, but there’s a brand I can grab off the shelf that’s pretty good, and a huge time-saver for me. My taste rating: (first time was 4/5 stars), this time 3/5. Cooking this recipe en mass really killed the charm. At least for me. I think everyone enjoyed it still, but I will keep comparing it to the first time.
Sunday was birthday brunch for my mom. This was an exceptionally fun event because I wasn’t the only cook. My brother who works at a small farm near Dayton brought a medley of root vegetables, with peppers, onions, eggs, etc. for a zesty skillet that was pretty dang spectacular. I knew Brandon wouldn’t be able to eat the eggs (aside from the fact that he didn’t like most of the vegetables, either) so I decided to show off my new favorite pancake recipe. Bridget isn’t kidding when she says that this recipe is highly customizable. My tweaks: 2 parts wheat flour/1 part all purpose, 1tsp cinnamon (I think it enhances the wheat flavor), I used skim milk & lemon juice rather than buttermilk. Last time I didn’t even have baking soda, so I added extra baking powder & butter, and egg beaters since I didn’t have any real eggs. Both times this recipe turned out amazing. My previous experience with the recipe also included home made strawberry jam, but since that’s a shortage this time of year, I made a strawberry syrup from this recipe. I had frozen strawberries, but no orange to zest, so I just added 3Tbsp orange juice (‘fresh’, ha! Try Tropicana from the grocery). How I almost ruined it: this was totally not my fault. Cooking in a strange kitchen is always a test, and apparently when you turn the range to ‘medium’ heat, it means ‘high’. First couple pancakes got a smidge burnt, but were eaten anyway. They were that good! My taste rating 5/5 stars. Obsessed with these recipes, for sure!
Other highlights of this weekend: Helping Jon pick out his ‘tree’ for the party, hanging out with Christie getting her school supplies/gifts & coercing her into getting a haircut (another funny story for another time), Dad’s reaction to getting a Kindle, finally giving mom the chicken I got for her in Chicago (also back in July) & hanging out with my brother and sister!

It gets better

I’m not gay.
I’m just different.
I’d say I only experienced a very moderate amount of bullying and teasing at school.
But for a small farm school in the middle of nowhere, Indiana, we had our fair share of freaks & geeks. And gay and lesbian teens. Some of them were my friends. Hiding out together in creative writing and drama clubs, we carved out a little safe place.
I couldn’t guess what happened during the rest of the day for some of my friends. For me, early in high school I was eschewed as a nerd, a freak, ass-kisser, brown-noser, and suck up. Once I started dating, I was mostly referred to as a slut.
I was more or less oblivious to a lot of the commentary, since I didn’t have that many friends to feed me the rumor mill. And the things I did hear, while stinging, I managed to learn to disregard. I was a smart kid, and I got along with my teachers very well, which allowed me a lot of privileges (in that limited high school world). And I was very flirtatious, touchy, and I had sex.
All and all I escaped relatively unscathed.
Unfortunately, there are a lot of kids who don’t.
The media has been full of blips of kids, gay, lesbian, or just different, who have taken their own lives because of bullying and tormenting from their peers and lack of support from those who are supposed to care for them. My heart breaks for these kids.
At a very terrible and low point in my life, I did contemplate its end. It’s not a secret, and my amazing family is the reason I am here, and whole. And happy.
The point is, there are places where bigotry and narrow-mindedness don’t exist. Sometimes you can go there, sometimes you have to make them for yourself. And after you find a place where you can love yourself, and surround yourself with people who love you, it gets better.
Writer Dan Savage has begun an amazing project of compiling inspirational stories of men and women (and everything in between) telling their stories of how their lives have gotten better even though at some point they thought that it never would. Check them out at http://www.itgetsbetterproject.com/
Also, there is an amazing resource for young adults (or anyone) who is feeling lost, depressed, or suicidal. Apparently these people have been helping kids since I was in high school, but they’ve gotten a fresh boost of publicity and attention along with the deaths of the kids they’re trying to help.http://www.thetrevorproject.org/

Take a look, remember that the only way to end bullying and intolerance is to lead and love by example, and help end this tragedy.

I don’t know you, but you can share my tea

This holiday season I decided that I probably had a lot more time on my hands than money lying about, and I should try my hand at making some gifts.
Well, now that I’m (almost) done with all that, I think I learned some things about myself that a) I wasn’t surprised about but b)I really am glad to know.
First of all, I baked about 8 dozen cookies and two cheesecakes this year. This still doesn’t seem like a lot when it’s said like that, but considering I waited until I was making the cheesecakes to bust out my Kitchenaid mixer, that’s a LOT of manual labor. I feel buff after two batches of oatmeal cookies. Also, we don’t have a dishwasher. So after the first couple rounds of baked goods, Brandon started doing dishes twice a day so I could always have my mixing bowls & measuring cups clean. (I don’t think I ever would have gotten all this done without his help). He also read recipes to me when I was elbow deep in batter, reminded me to set timers, and bravely tested all my creations. Only once did he spit it out and tell me that it was under-cooked.
Anyway, I realized that I know a lot more about cooking & baking than I thought. I’ve watched a lot of PBS cooking shows. And I can’t remember an age that I wasn’t helping my mom & grandmother in the kitchen. I feel really comfortable there.
The other thing I learned is that I really love the look on a person’s face when you give them exactly what they’re craving. “You made this? Really?”
Yup, really.
On the flip side, I’m really glad to be (almost) done with this for a while. Dinner for two has never sounded better.

a little more

It’s no secret I’ve been really lucky in life. Even in my worst mistakes, I’ve walked away relatively unscathed. I did manage to learn a few really tough lessons, though. Never ever take advantage of someone who loves you. Set something aside, just in case. Be good to everyone; it will come back around.
But even these lessons are hard to follow all the time. I feel like I’ve gotten a little lazy. I spent too much this year, especially considering my (temporary) pay cut and the medical bills from having my appendix out. The crazy thing is, I gave most of it away. I love to give the perfect gift.
I’m not sure how I feel about karma, but do those things sort of cancel each other out?
Regardless, Christmas will be here before you know it, and I’ll have to be smarter about it.

I’m thinking about another tattoo, to compliment the angel on my shoulder. I’m feeling… a tree.